LOVE

          As I sit and think about the thoughtless and unknowing ways I gave my heart to men I loved or thought I've loved, and the way it repaid me, makes me question loves motives, and why is it so important to Jesus that we love everyone unconditionally as he does us; almost seems impossible, when time after time our hearts are broken to the point of how do I return, how do I continue to love one who is unappreciative and undeserving of such sacrificial acts. Just the thought of it makes me want to regret not saving my heart for the one who was customized only for me, but if I did, I wouldn't be who I am today. I guess it's fair to say that I'm a sucker for love, as my ex use to say; disregarding the fact that he was unable to love anyone, justifies how humans are so numb to the outcome of Love's credentials.

          Love is the foundation needed no matter what you do in life whether right or wrong. It's a fight, a yearning sensation deep down in your soul, you can't deny it, you can hide it, love can't be replaced, and no matter how hard you try, you can't escape it. The difference between the love I gave away before that didn't love me back, and the love I have now found, is the kind of love that won't fail me, won't leave me, won't forget me, and will never, ever, mistreat me. His passion is compassion for the many times I broke his heart. For the times I left him standing all alone to be with another, for the three times I gave myself away to become someones mother, in another man's bed while he was at home waiting for me to walk through the door, and greet him like every night before.

         Never once thinking about the way that made him feel when all he ever did was love me the exact way I searched, and longed for while in the right places at the wrong time. When I think about all the pain and suffering he went through just for me, breaks my heart and brings me to my knees begging for him not to leave me. In need of one more chance so that I can show Him, now I understand, how much I need him as I seek his face pleading for forgiveness of my sins, when I get lost in this ugly place sparkled with diamonds and pearls, filled with enough deception for every woman, boy, man, and girl.

          The only way you can understand the way I feel about the wrong love the world gives or what people who consume it portrays and mimics real love to be, that only leaves us so empty and feeling all alone, filled with unsufficiency, and spiritually cursed, is to be not conformed to it, but be ye transformed from it, by renewing your mind and the love you seek won't be blind, and no matter how long it takes it will definitely be on time.



                                                              -Ethel Robertson-

"Mirror's"

As I look in the mirror and think what a figure; starring back at me

What, You not happy with what you see
take a good look, dig deep, then get back at me
don't stare for to long, for you'll only give yourself time to see the wrong

Strong, beauty, brains, shame, confused, rude, abused, kool, calm, collected, well put together;
just to name a few, but I aint through
there are still a few things I must do

"I am that chick" Yep, with plenty flaws

From dog to dog, who spent big money in plenty malls
the glitz, the glamour, the ride will put you on a high; beware
you wont come down, you'll be tweeking, and end up in a nod on the ground

I was built ford tough and knows when enuff is enuff

What can you do for me that I can't do for myself, what good is a man that has no wealth
check the definition, it means I need for you to be on a mission
I'm not referring to the way you ball, naw, I don't need a show off at all

Now, back to you that's in the mirror, think twice before you think you got me figured
without a doubt, I know struggle, this game called life will take you under
it's up to you on what you want to do, my best advice is to open up and let god through

Mirror's were created for seeing through, even though you may not want to see what stares back at you
don't put your mind and body to waste, get up be creative, and chase that cake
believe and have no fear, let your name ring from ear to ear

check the mirror and see all that's in you
never mind your haters, they were created to be your motivators, let them inspire you
just listen quietly to that still small voice God built to enquire you

"Striving For Success"

My Horoscope (LEO) Reads:

Put everything you've got into your future.  

Both personal and professional achievement can be made.  

A change of scenery or planning your next trip will motivate you to work hard, play hard and strive to live life to the fullest.

THEORY

First it tells me put everything I've got into my future. Change my scenery, plan a trip, because it will motivate me to work hard.

Play hard and "Strive to live to the fullest."

I agree with every statement, Except for encouraging one to Strive for Success.

To Strive- defines exert strenuous efforts: Labor. To struggle against. Contend.

If any of you are striving towards success, I suggest you stop.

Why?

The self-focused person strives continually for greater and greater success, more and more wealth, more and more fame, more and more power.

vs

The God-focused and spiritually mature person is freed from striving. He lives in a steady state of confidence-confidence in God's power and presence, confidence born of relationship with God-while at the same time living in the hope of greater and greater things that God will unfold and reveal and bestow.

Ethel Robertson

"Fearless"

I am Salt (crystalline solid)
I am Brightness (light)

Which causes you to persecute thee
Yep!, Lil ol me
due to my principles, which allows me to label you as my "expendables"
to put me up on this pedestal, where I lay your hate on my plate; and make you a great debate of edibles

I have reason to believe that I was created; More like mandated;
because the poll of opinions about me are out of control,
Now you haters must pay the toll
Like, I was supposed to bow down and let you wear my crown
I command you to stop clowns!

Excuse my expressions, between the lines you'll hear the vulgarity, without them being exposed, it shows my true clarity of a diamond, 24K gold that's been through refinery

Fearless, is my aggression to my opponents of the great depression

"Strong Hold"

Obscured, is what I am when Im with you
my heels are tired of walking these hardwood floors, back, then forth
the walls keeps a whisper, loud and clear
run for your life
Yet, I stay
begging you please, I dont want to fight another night
my request falls upon deaf ears and I'm forced to welcome my best friend, his name is fear, who I use to know as Nick
we meet two or three times a week
I sit with blood and bruises, wondering why god wont hear my cries
I'm far from alive as I live, starring the dawn of death in his eyes
it is I, who is me, who is you, and she, whom chooses to lay here and die
Still, I rise from deep within
despise all the true lies I hold inside, so I stay and prey, that maybe, just maybe
one day, I wont have to cry not to stay, rather to enjoy the prince I once knew,
and he'll carress my face with warmth and grace, of sensual kisses placed on my face, Instead of his fists who always seems to win first place

"The Beggining of the End"

What if I waited to late; to get my life straight;
It's almost time to walk through the pearly gates
Destruction after disater; now I wanna run a little faster
I have so many scars; I try so hard to do right by you lord;
Afraid to leave my kids behind; fear sets in right about this time

I trust, I beleive that I will live my dream; but I realize
I may not reach my destiny until I enter your stream
Tear stains trinkles my page reminding me of lifes pain;
From all the pain I will gain; not in vain but to remain
Free from drama; I should have tried harder than to just be a man's baby mama

Now is my time; I refuse not to shine
Brighter than silver and gold
Yellow like dorothy's brick road

Reaching for the stars; wondering will I get far
When enough is enough and the going gets ruff; It is then one gets tuff

"Tunnel"

Long, narrow, yet wide, opened up for me to come inside
Bright lights gleaming through; who ever knew what good it's able to create for you


Many closed doors; I'm steady searching for its hole
Let me through; I have things to do

Fighting, and fighting, but I only find I'm hurting myself
Not allowing a greater power to devour this strong tower
LET ME OUT, I wanna get through, I command you door be removed

Finally I'm through only to see there are more bumps, holes, and doors up ahead;
I must trust you, and continue to let you guide me while I travel down this road

Greatness lies ahead, Im focused now that takers are not allowed in my bed
50 miles in only 100,000 to go
Where this road ends only god knows

I'm going left when I wanna go right
Taking trips, first class flights
All I see are diamonds & pearls, in a land of milk and honey; realizing everything is not about money


Looking in my review, receiving a clearer view; thanking God for pulling me through

Geared up with praise; pumped and ready; a few souls I must save
Step aside and let this diva through; its Gods work I was created to do

Classic, fantastic, is how I wrap you haters up in plastic
 For the end is almost near; and I'll be damned if  I just stand filled with fear